I think I'm confusing my days.

It's true. Well, it's the third day of this getting-back-to-work week, but Day 5 of starting over. ? Is that right? I think it is.

Update for yesterday.
We left work early to work on electricity (E Lec Tri-city) issues. We found what was obvious problem. We went to store, got stuff and went back to fix. Dad grumbled that I didn't know - whatever he was trying to do, but he did fix/replace parts. Plugged back in and (insert Pretty Loud Noise here) and then nothing. The noise came over from the main electrical box. Not the house. But when dad re-tested, the main electrical box read ok. But now the electricity is broken, broken. Before, it was trying to work. There were dim lights, not no lights. And humming things that just didn't have enough power to turn on and now, nothing.
So, we more broke it. :/
I finished taking all the yuck food stuff out of the off refrigerator and cleaned the floor some. Double bagged the yuck and stuck it in the trunk. (We have to haul out our own trash.)
So we trudged back to other little town and had dinner and checked back into the motel.
We got up early this morning to go work on the house and dad was all that he couldn't see in there and that he was too big to fit. So I went and looked.
Yeah. It was a small space of maybe 2 x 8 INCHES! No one could fit. No one could see. You'd have to be a fairy or - no, that's it. You'd have to be a fairy to fit.
So I called the do-it-all dude who worked on our house. He said he could come see and hopefully have it up and running by this afternoon. I really hope so because I want to go home! And I'm a gonna! ;)

Ok. So in review: I survived another day. But there has to be more. I need to figure out what I want and get going towards it.
That's what's confusing, isn't it? Just one day bleeding into another with no change in sight.

Basically, there is all of September left and October, November and December for this year. That is almost four, full months. Let's see what we can do! And when I say "we," I of course mean me. I need to change. I need to match my words with my intentions. I need to live a happier, more fulfilled life.

I just got home from vacation and all I want to do is huddle in the corner. But if you live big, big things happen. You live small and nothing ever happens, no change, no life. Live big! LIVE BIG!

Survival: Day One review - Day Two preview

I did survive and it wasn't too bad.
I just deleted a three-paragraph rant about my sister and ATMs. But you didn't need to read all that. Suffice it to say: Don't trust ATMs. Sister is nothing but a big ball of irritation to me.

Had Delicious salad and fish at Outback. (This is not a paid endorsement.) I just really like their blue cheese wedge salad. I often just go to have that salad and a cup of soup. It's not a bad price when you do that.

Went to the teeny trailer. And No Electricity. And many, many mosquito bites. We ended up coming into a nearby town to a motel and checking in. Nothing fancy but a price we could afford, so ok.

I have to admit: I slept in my clothes again. AND I forgot my toothbrush at home. :/ You are *so* lucky to be reading this and not here in person where I'd be telling you this. My teeth feel GroSs! I did take a shower this morning so I should not offend. You know this girl's got to bathe at least once a day. You know that this girl often bathes multiple times daily.
Also: I didn't remember to bring the sunscreen. I did for the face stuff so ok - but not the all over stuff. I put a little of the face stuff on my arms. (Stuff is Too Expensive to really slather on.)

So - overall? I survived. Got to do more than just survive, though. Need to be living with intention - living and working towards goals that will let me truly live a more complete life--in all its glory and all its gore (gory glory?). I need to begin to crack open all life's promises, in all its technicolor and majesty. There is no one but me who can do that for me. It's all me, baby.

Today's Goal: Survival.

It's true. I just wrote all this good, better, best intention stuff (see above) and my goal for today? To survive. Bummer.

I had a client coming in. She's super nice - and I left her file in the big city. We took it with us last time we were here so we could seek guidance. Oh, well. She wasn't really prepared, either. I told her what we still needed and advised her to come back/email/call if she received the needed items - or didn't. Why waste the gas coming here if it were going to be a "hello" and just a status update. Although, she is very pleasant.

Had worker bee come in to visit that cannot work for us anymore. He brought in ideas for what may work out. But - less than ideal to be sure.

Did sister's stupid favor. (I'm not bitter.)

Those are all done. For the rest of the day we need to discover why we do NOT have working electricity.

Ok. That's what we have to do. Figure out the electricity and see about getting it fixed. Go!

First Day back at work. Boo!

Well, on this third new day and the first day I'm back at work following my vacation, I'd like to say Boo! Booooooo! Hiss.

Ok. Well. I think that my intentions for the day will be just to survive it.

I had to wake up early. done.
I had to stop and pick up dad and get him breakfast. done.
I had to drive the nearly 4 hours. done.
I had to show up. done. (Boooo.)

I have a stack of crap on the desk. I went to the mail box first thing. Stack of crap in there.
:)

It's going to be a glorious day!

Now, I just have to figure this stuff out.

Most Tired Ever

Yesterday in review.
So I did not forget yesterday.. I just wistfully thought about it as I went to bed anyway. I went to bed *really* early, feeling tired and thinking I needed it. Apparently I did. The alarm went off for 13 minutes before I woke up enough to know the damn alarm was waking me up. Huh.

Also: I'm going to admit. I slept in my clothes and didn't do my nighttime regime. Yes, that's My breath you're smelling. You're welcome.

Let's see. I don't really remember what was on my list.

I did change my sheets. Yay! Nothing beats clean sheet day, except for maybe clean Everything day. I also Very frequently wash all of my pillows, too. I have a lot of pillows. A lot. I think I have eight. It could be 10. And I wash them all (at least once a month) and dry them and it takes forever but NOTHING Beats Clean Bedding! (I probably have low standards.)
I think I deserve a medal or something for it (the changing the sheets yesterday). Not a big medal or anything.. more like a metaphorical medal. Because I was really tired and I did it anyway. Because it was on the stupid list. Seriously. I'm pathetic. I put it on the list and I wanted something to report and I wanted a damn check mark. --So Check Mark and teeny, tiny metaphorical medal going on my lapel. Just kidding. I don't have a lapel.

I did have the family luncheon yesterday with my aunt and uncle and my other aunt and Sister and my father. So yay! that. --Check Mark

Seriously. What was on that stupid list?
Well, I did give the girls much love.
I took out the trash. (pretty sure this wasn't on the list.)
Watched a movie on Netflix (twice). I really liked the movie and so when Mc came down, I was all, wanna a watch a movie? By the way - it was Finding Bliss. With Leelee Sobieski and the cutie from Legally Blonde Matthew Davis. I totally dug it. And it had a happy, romantic ending. And you know, I'm a sucker for a happy, romantic ending. You may not like. But I really did.

OOOh. I just checked. I did Not have a pedicure. Just as well, didn't really need one and I was just going so I could see my bestie.. but she didn't go afterall and I was Really tired (I thought we covered this).
HA! I DID NOT give up SUGAR. That's funny. Yep. Nope. Sugar, sugar, sugar.

But it *was* a day of rest. So there ya go. I have to hurry, because I have to get ready and drive 4 hours so I can go to work. Which? I totally do not want to do. Boo! Boo!

Seriously, Stop!

I, apparently, am now, unfortunately, addicted to Twitter. (Heeee. Wasn't that the Most Obnoxious sentence?)

Seriously, I've got to stop. There's nothing there. I've got nothing to tweet. I'm fairly boring, so I'm looking up other people, but I don't want to follow a lot of people because then my phone is all clogged with stuff. And it's not like I have a lot of spare time. So stop wasting it. -Wait. Didn't I read, or was told on my recent travels, Time is not "wasted" if you enjoyed it. Pretty sure I'm going to go with that. Ok, done. I'm not going to feel guilty as I just got home, haven't had a computer, and it's the weekend.

K.

So, if I'm starting anew. This is day two.
Oh, for yesterday -- I did give the girls lots and lots of love. Check Mark! :)

Back to day two:
I'm not going to do a lot.
I'm going to make my bed.
I'm going to give girls more love.
I'm going to have lunch with family.
I might have a pedicure.
I might give up sugar. Huh? Yeah, well, we'll see how that goes.

We are going to crown this day: Day of rest.
Even though that isn't true and at some point tonight I'm going to have to pack and get ready to leave again.

Oh! And I think I might lie in bed and read some on a book. Indulgences!

Day One (again)

Well, first off, I did Not take the walk. It was crazy hot. And I intended to do it tonight. I have not and now it is late and I am not. Nope. Oh, well.

I did have a nice dinner with nephew, Sister, Dad and nephew's - umm, friend? She was very nice and she seemed to like me - so she has EXcellent taste. yep. I'm *that* person. I did call G and go over to his house. We had some lunch and we played some Wii Mario Kart. I also saw an old friend (who's G's roommate's boyfriend). So that was actually expected. But still, good. I did do some laundry. I did run to the grocery - picked up some fruit and some juice. I did arrange to have lunch tomorrow with family - geez, that took a minute. Anyway, done.

I did Not do fifteen minutes in my room. I doubt I will do that, either. I sat here for the last 30+ catching up on twitter. My computer is THAT slow. I swear, McAffee *just* expired and now the computer will not go. It's worse than when a computer had acoustic coupling. Remember that? When you took the phone hand/head part and stuck it in the suction cup thingees (think War Games). What? *You're* the one that's old. You are! You Are!

I did take a minute and (not really) clean the fridge. Basically, I straighted it out and tossed some old yuck. It soo annoys me to have a fridge so full you can't find anything in it. I need some visual space in my fridge so I can find stuff and eat the goodness. Also gross!: Mc continually puts items in the fridge that have no cover. Just sticks a cut onion in there. A bowl of unknown sauce origin in there. I asked him nicely a while back - ummm, there are four mustards (all the same - plain mustard) in the fridge. Why do we have four mustards? (At the time there were three regular mayos (one in a gallon jar) and another olive oil mayo.) He replied, "There are?" He explained that he didn't know and he didn't want to run out.. etc. That he would combine them.
Still waiting on that.

Niceness: I discovered that I could loop my new silver chain around and use it as an anklet. I think I might just do that. :) --dumb, but I still think one of the sexiest things I ever saw was Kim Cattrall in Mannequin with the thick bracelet that she was wearing as an anklet. (showing my age.)

Today was mostly pleasant, but I'm no closer to redesigning my life. Although G and I did go to Home Depot where I eye humped some new lighting for the house. I think it's finally time to get rid of the 70's orange, spanish-inspired monstrosity in my entry way. I mean I like it, but I think it's time to move on.

Play it again, Sam!

By the way: Humphrey Bogart never says that line in Casablanca but you already knew that.

So: Intention. Living life with intention.

Today:

I am doing laundry. (So Much excitement.)

Love my girls. (pleasure)

Have dinner with my sister and father and nephew (and his girl who is also a friend?) for their birthdays. (this should be interesting.)

Run to the grocery.

Make a budget (and stick to it).

Call my aunts and see if we can make plans for a little somethin', somethin' (for tomorrow, Not today).

Call some friends.

Spend 15 minutes working on my room.

Take a walk. (for real.)

That's my list. I'm hoping that as I take my walk, I will start figuring out what I want. But if I get a little serenity out of it, that's ok too. So maybe no figuring out will happen. Maybe I'll just get a little calm.

Holy Charge Card, Batman!

Ummm. I made a mistake. I just checked my bank balance - which also showed one of my credit cards - yeeeaaah. I am a dumbass. And a fool. And completely fucking stupid.

Get a grip, girrrrll. Stop spending.

It's true. Don't be too hard on yourself but let's definitely start working on that budget. Right away.

Good luck on that.

Luck!

What? I didn't post At All in August? WTH?

Well. I just got back from a three-week long road trip with Sister and my father. It was just supposed to be dad and me but she doesn't have a job and doesn't want one, so why not mooch a cross-country trip? Yeah, why not?

And by "just," I mean last night. We got in last night. So, color me exhausted and doing a freakin' great job of checking in! why don't ya?

Also: I didn't want to post on the trip because it's a pain to post off of the phone and its little keyboard and I just put two and two together and realized that you could see my email and my profile and this blog. I did *not* want them to be linked. I mean, I don't care if people read this blog, but no one ever does - so I say some shit on this thing. If the rare person that knows me (awww, I don't have many friends. sad.), were to see this, I guess that'd be ok, but if I knew they were, I might change what I was writing. I'd edit (to spare feelings and to make my life easier). And I don't want to do that. SO! I figured out how to change my profile and now only the government and I know that I am the same person. I don't think the government cares. I don't really care, either. However, when I changed my profile thingee.. it reads that I just started. I would like to point out that my old bloggy thingee read that I'd been blogging since 2004. Not successfully nor regularly but intermittenly and I don't care! I want credit for doing it when it was cool - heeee. Not now when it is not -- or you can make money off of it and quit your "real" job to be a "journalist" or some-shit else. I do Not see that happening in my future. But right now I don't see much of a future at all.

Not that I'm all depressed like and woe-is-me, I just was kind of thinking about it on our trip and I want my life to be different. BUT I have no idea what I want it to be. I just don't know. I think this is my problem approx. 95% of the time. I have no clear notion or idea at all of what I want or like. I just have a list of dislikes and don't wants. It's hard to go about things backwards. But I always do.

Ok. First things first.
I have been doing fairly well (not perfectly) with my edict.

I have been washing my face at night. I have been moisturizing. And even when I haven't, I have been wearing my sunscreen. I have been brushing teeth, etc. I have been trying to eat healthier.
--I have NOT been exercising. I haven't been avoiding Wal-Mart, but I haven't been there much, either. OH. Yeah. Budget. I don't know what this is. I've never heard of one, don't know how to recognize one, don't know what to do with one. REALLY need to work on that. Vitamins: haven't been doing this one, either. Since I can't seem to stomach them at night, I haven't gotten switched around to take them in the morning.

So. I think I should go back to trying to write out a plan every morning and working through the day with intention. It was working (for a week). But still, it was working.
I will probably post about our groovy, cross-country trip a little later. That would be nice. Maybe for posterity, etc. Probably mostly to help my ever-dwindling memory.

I'm gonna try for sleep. Wish me luck.

-Night.