Monday, June 27, 2011

I didn't create cancer either

Well, this weekend I did not cure cancer, but that wasn't really on my to-do list. Doing a shit-ton of work was.
Today I had the opportunity to do quite a bit of work, meaning that I did have the time, but I sat on my big behind. (by the way - I watched a BIZARRE Japanese film about cricket sumo wrestling and sex. Ummm, I do not recommend.)

But: Status update!

I have now been doing my best to follow along with the edict and been doing the whole night-time routine bit. Including flossing. uh-huh. This chick's gettin' it done. Flossing sucks, by the way. But having your teeth fall out yo head probably sucks more.
Plus, I have also been moisturizing and sunscreening in the day. Woot! me.

Back to the above - not that I have attention deficit disorder, or anything. But Netflix rocks! You can watch bizarre, dumb Japanese movies about sex and fighting bugs and then you can catch up on some tv (who needs to do that?). A comedy? No problem. Feeling a little serious, we've got the film for you. The streaming capability - I can't say enough. Really, really cool.

Wow. Apparently this post was about nothing. Except giving Netflix some free advertising. Way to go - like they need your free endorsement. They could pay, you know! Not that they would pay me... but they could definitely afford to.

Friday, June 24, 2011

I'm still gonna Lie about my Age

Ok. So it happened and I turned 40. Years. Old.
I do not feel forty, in fact, I barely feel old enough to drink - or I feel ninety. I'm not sure which.
I need to start making a plan because it ain't getting any better than this - UNLESS I do something to make it so.
So, with that in mind, I need to start changing some stuff 'round here.
1) Wash face every night. Do Not decide that you are too tired and you'll get up in a minute and do the entire nightly routine and then fall asleep in a heap in your clothes.
2) Brush teeth morning and night AND floss. Seriously. Floss, floss, floss. You need your teeth. Dental is soo expensive. And how ugly would you be if you had no teeth? Can you say UnAttractive? See number 1 above. Do not say you are too tired to do entire nightly routine - and then fall asleep all gross! For the love of . . . your teeth? Floss!
3) Moisturize. See items 1 and 2 above. Do not fall asleep and Not do some moisturization. And then sleep on your face and wake up with crazy wrinkles running across your face - and then do this for another 15 years and your face has those pillow wrinkles Permanently! Be nice to your face, give a little love, put some goo into your pores to perk them up and let them say, ahhh! Also - put a little lotion on those sad dogs of yours. Seriously, the pedicure guy would Really appreciate it. He worked soo hard last time.
4) Take a multi-vitamin. While you're at it - some calcium too! See item 2 above. You need your teeth and you need your bones. You are already prone to breakage. Give some love to your hard parts. Also: see item 1 above. Do not fall asleep and Not Take Your Vitamin(s). Seriously, all you have to do is swallow. You are Not too tired to swallow. Do it!
5) Back to the skin. You live on the surface of the sun. Wear SunScreen! You are getting old lady spots on your driving arm. Gross! A little sunscreen goes a long way! Use it! Use it! Use it! Sunscreen on face, neck, decolletage, and arms at the very least.
6) Get some exercise in. Seriously, a little walk will do you good. One foot in front of the other. You learned to do it some time ago, I don't know why you're afraid of it now. It totally isn't hard.
7) Follow this for awhile! Let's see if we can make it habit (and then we'll add some more--but don't get scared).
OH and for good measure:
8) Stop shopping at Wal-mart. I know it seems as if they have good prices, but you just get annoyed and often spend more than you want (when you're not annoyed). PLUS! Evil corporation. Shop local, feel good about the money you spend.
9) Ooooh! Seriously, stick to a budget. SAVE some Money, girl.
Ok. Here's the list for now.
Happy Birthday to Me! Now, Grow Up!