Friday, June 30, 2006

Wow! I'm repetitive

Just perusing my old posts and how many times have I said the same thing over and over. How many times in life have I done the same thing?
Isn't that the definition of crazy: repeating the same action over and over again and expecting different results?
I do it in life. Over and over again. I'm going to .
I'm going to work out. I'm going clean my closet, my room, my car. I'm going to keep my room clean, the kitchen clean, the living room tidy, my mind tidy. And on and on.
Most people probably do this. Difference is they aren't idle repititions for me. I truly mean them. Again and again. And the shame and guilt - Whoa! Nelly! I should be Jewish or Catholic or whichever group rends their clothing and cuts their hair and beats themselves with ouchy whip-things.
well.
I have been to the gym starting on Tuesday and every day following.
I haven't cleaned my room. I haven't even vacuumed the living room. But perhaps we can only do one thing at a time until it sticks - and then we can start on the next new project.
And no fair saying that as a whole, I'm a project. It's true, just no fair saying.

1 comment:

Bruce Pratt , Bruce Pratt Jr. said...

Hi again. I've visited before. I didn't remember until I arrived just now. Thanks for visiting me. that was nice. You seem awfully hard on yourself. You said something about noticing how you say the same things over and over. The first thing that came to my mind was, "As I sit here, and oftentimes, I wish
I could be monarch of a desert land
I could devote and dedicate forever
To the truths we keep coming back and back to."
I'm re-reading some of my favorite poams by robert frost. you know, now that I see it written out maybe it isn't as fitting as I first thought. It has been amazing to me how much of an insight one can recieve on these blogs. how individual people are. A lot of times I'm sad, seeing thousands of people going the other way on the highway. I know they all have a life that surrounds them. A family, friends, money issues, beliefs, etc etc. And some of these people would be the nicest person I could ever meet. They could be my best friend or maybe my soulmate. The only thing is, chance says we will never meet because we are driving opposite directions in a city I may never see again. I like your pages.